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Usually while I’m getting dressed I would think about why I’m doing this and who I’m doing it for, but I’ve never actually thought about how I got here. That thought brings me down when I need to give myself a pep talk to prepare for tonight. But my mind won’t stray from the past. *********Flash-Back********* I was only 16 when my mom found out that she had terminal cancer…it was a rough time for us, she was undergoing treatment but it didn’t seem to be making her any better, in fact, she seemed even worse than before. My father left when I was six years old and we haven’t seen him since. Our insurance didn’t cover my mom’s medical bills and my mom’s family disowned her when she married my dad. My dad’s side of the family is non-existent, and even if they weren’t, we wouldn’t know how to get a hold of them. My mom stopped treatment after six months without any success. She’s not able to work and we are barely surviving off of the money that we have. Mom ended up using the majority of. And attractive. And almost stylish. All at once. I wore one all the time I was at IWB and I suppose I was proud to wear it. It showed I was in fellowship with all the other girls. Now I just feel sick, deep inside. One day I will have to rid myself of this collar but it's another hurdle to climb if I am ever to escape from these people. It's stupid. I'm talking about ridding myself of it even though I don't have it on yet. It's obvious that I'm going to have it put it on me. It must be obvious to Neena too."Vyerka! Your collar. See? It has your name and number engraved on it - just here." Neena's tone is matter of fact. She smiles.She picks up the hateful collar and shows it to me, points out to me the neat script on one side: my entry in their asset register: K AH 101109 RZ my name: вера and my slave registration number: 836-906-368 (2)"Rabiyna: I need to show you ... this ... and this ... and this ... and this." Neena points in turn to two areas on the inside of the collar the one.
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